ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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