were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
