I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
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