Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
