Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
