I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
