"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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