I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
