god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
