Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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