I think i peed on brittanys purse
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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