drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
