You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize