So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
