Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
