Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
