ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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