Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
