hell yes lets make some ravioli
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
