Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize