I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
