It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
