he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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