3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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