Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
