Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
