Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize