Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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