she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
