Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
