Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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