Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
