i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
