I just pynch a tree in the face
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
