Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
