Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize