Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
