I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
