WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Randomize
