What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
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