What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
