conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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