I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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