Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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