Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
