She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize