3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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