It's like God shit irony all over that family
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
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