i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
you would pick up someone in the library
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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