good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
